What Do You Do with a General...

When my friend heard about my fascination with Hank Azaria, she told me about a strange and funny movie, “Mystery Men”, where everyday men use everyday objects to become like superheroes. Although with a different slant, “The Incredibles”, offers the same take on the desire to rid the world of evil. They are superheroes who are past their prime, unappreciated and misrepresented. They lurk around at night listening to the police scanners in the hope that they can still sneak in and fight crime.

 Even the sweet general in White Christmas faced the same issues. He was trying to get back into service. The song said, “What do you do with a general when he stops being a general?” He found himself spending the days waiting for the mailman and wishing to be useful.

Though we’ll never stop being parents, we do lose the “superpowers” we had when our children were babies and toddlers. At one point we made the world all right - better than all right - with a bottle, a trip to Chuck E Cheese or an ice cream cone. We had all the right answers and we were watched and copied by our little ones.

Somehow as the years pass, we lose our edge. Bullying at school becomes an issue that we can’t fix with a band-aid. We have an uneasy feeling about our teenager’s friends but we can’t follow them around constantly. Our adult children become strangers and we are no longer the people whose opinions they seek.

Inside we still yearn to help, to guide, to make it all right. Of course prayer is the answer. It always is. But when our kids are grown and we are out-of-work “superheroes”, must we just accept that it was fun and fulfilling while it lasted? Is it possible that maybe we can start the whole process over? You’ll be so relieved to learn that it doesn’t involve having another whole set of kids!

All we have to do is get involved in another life, be available to listen, to comfort and to share ourselves. Develop a level of trust and watch a super-friendship grow. Now if they’ll just quit using spandex in the uniform!