Greater Is He

Perhaps I am an attention hog. I try to be a quiet attention hog. I’ve always been hopeful that no one knows this, though now you all do. I need love, positive reinforcement, warm fuzzies.

The entertainment business has never intrigued me in the least. I have far too many flocks of butterflies in my innards for it to appeal. But I so love the lyrics to Chris Sligh’s “Empty Me” because they absolutely represent the lesson I most need to learn:

“Empty me of the selfishness inside, every vain ambition and the poison of my pride and any foolish thing my heart holds to, Lord, empty me of me so I can be filled with you.”

I’ve read my Bible and I’ve heard the Sunday school teacher. My intellect knows the lesson: God wants to be my source of all – every need, want and desire – and He will provide. He does His best work in my life when I am desperately seeking Him.

So why does my heart crave what I get from people? Why do I need to hear good things from my friends? Why do I forget to just keep taking it to Jesus for His loving attention?

This morning I was feeling particularly “needy”. And I was talking to Jesus about this very thing and asking His forgiveness for being so stubborn. And I sat down at the computer and I hit “send and receive” and I received a precious email that gave me what I needed and so much more.

This time at least I had the good sense to first of all thank and praise God for it. And I sat for a while and basked in the glow of feeling good. Then, guess what I did?

Of course. I began to think “who can I tell?” Because it wasn’t enough for me to feel good. I needed for someone else, not to feel good with me, but to reinforce and tell me how I deserved that email.

I struggle with pride. I’m quite open about it, but I always add “not that I think I’m better than anyone else! I just like attention.” But isn’t it all the same thing? Doesn’t it all boil down to putting me first? Doesn’t matter at that point whether I put Jesus or other people second because I’ve already messed up the order!

Two sweet friends shared a scripture with me this past weekend and, because God’s Word never returns void, it took! (I kept my email to myself) And for that same reason, I’ll share it with you.

John 3:30
He must become greater; I must become less.